It's Jamie Time!

Talking to my sister Jaffy earlier, I told her that both Whitney and Todd we're back in PC, and Pete was working, so therefore, I'm home alone all night with no one to talk to. And in response she says "Look's like you'll get a lot of Jamie time!, nice."

Or maybe not so.

Don't get me wrong, some time to yourself is nice, yes; but not when its in overabundance. More and more, I HATE being home alone. In the shower tonight (bet you're happy to be in the shower with me, aren't ya!) I realized I could never live by myself. I feel like one of those puppies, where they're bred to be pack dogs, and do better with the company of other dogs. *Side note-I just finished watching two episodes of "Its me or the dog", aka my new favorite show.

So then after thinking about this for a while, and trying but failing to get some company from Dinah (she was in one of her moods tonight), I jumped online to eat some time and coincidentally, and through a random blog, found a personality test.

After answering 72 assorted questions, I learned I am an ENFP: Extroverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving. A what now?

If you happen to be interested in a detailed description of my "personality", you can click here.

Here are a few excerpts I found pretty interesting, and from what I can tell, pretty accurate.

ENFPs have what some call a "silly switch." They can be intellectual, serious, all business for a while, but whenever they get the chance, they flip that switch and become CAPTAIN WILDCHILD, the scourge of the swimming pool, ticklers par excellence. Sometimes they may even appear intoxicated when the "switch" is flipped.

ENFPs are pleasant, easygoing, and usually fun to work with.
They come up with great ideas, and are a major asset in brainstorming sessions. Follow through tends to be a problem, however; they tend to get bored quickly, especially if a newer, more interesting project comes along. They also tend to be procrastinators, both about meeting hard deadlines and about performing any small, uninteresting tasks that they've been assigned.

Because ENFPs live in the world of exciting possibilities, the details of everyday life are seen as trivial drudgery. They place no importance on detailed, maintenance-type tasks, and will frequently remain oblivous to these types of concerns. When they do have to perform these tasks, they do not enjoy themselves.

ENFPs often have strong, if unconvential, convictions on various issues related to their Cosmic View. They usually try to use their social skills and contacts to persuade people gently of the rightness of these views.

Friends are what life is about to ENFPs, more so even than the other NFs. They hold up their end of the relationship, sometimes being victimized by less caring individuals. ENFPs are energized by being around people.

Some have real difficulty being alone , especially on a regular basis.

Interesting...so maybe I am like the pack dogs after all? What do you think?

Well anyways, after taking this test and diving deep into my subconscious and true personality....it turns out I got more "Jamie time" than I had expected.

And it wasn't half bad.

My stomach is rotting gruuaaabllaahhh

I'm hungover as poo. I haven't been hungover like this in a LONG time. Sucks.

Also, I'm late for work.

That is all.

Who's your Daddy?

If you are one of the many who ask their children this from time to time, you can have now peace of mind thanks to new do-it-yourself paternity tests. These handy dandy little kits are now in over 4,300 stores in 30 states across the nation. And best of all, for only 19.99$ they can be yours... YOU SKANK. No, I'm just jokin' with ya.... skanky pants! Seriously though, the demand for this is so high you can now find it next to the cough syrup at Walgreens? What a shame, but more importantly, how embarrassing! It would be bad enough having to hand the cashier some kind of de-funking cream, super maximum strength tampons, or even a pregnancy test, but now this?!

Can I get a price check on a home paternity test, I repeat, a HOME PATERNITY TEST, yes, isle five, for the girl in the hat and dark sunglasses? Thanks.

Look's like Maury Povich might be out of work for a while, damn.

Ya gotta love it when your roommate let's you pay rent in liquor!

Yup, that's right! Well, sort of. I paid Todd the bulk of rent in cash, so instead of writing a check or withdrawing five dollars (what was missing from the cash), I paid with a half empty 10$ bottle of vodka. Shweet!

In other news, I do believe I've caught a pretty bad case of the Blogging Bug. This stuff is pretty addicting! I'm sure it will die out over time, and anyone who reads this will be restricted to maybe, say, three blogs a day(sorry guys). And although I don't have anything fantastic to write about at the moment, I thought I would share with you an email I received last week:

SUBJECT: Yes.

"I'll really call in on the nuns, he said to the officers who
watched him smilingly, and he rode off by the winding path down the
hill.

Now then, lets see how far it will carry, Captain. Just try. said
the general, turning to an artillery officer."

Wow. Thank you Lela Bridges, whoever you are, for quite possibly the best email I'll ever receive. Snidbit of a short story? Mad Libs? I'll never know for sure (I wrote her back but she didn't reply), but I believe It'd lose it's magic if I did know, so really, I do not care.

Know what's really ugly? Red chipped polish on your fingernails.

Know what's really fun? Chipping red polish off your fingernails... Go figure.

Yes, aren't they dear? I can't stop chipping them, it's very addicting and strangely satisfying...and I'm too lazy to clean and paint them, so this is how they'll stay. Maybe in a day or two all the polish will be gone, and poof! problem solved.

Despite their current 20$ hooker appearance, I LOVE my nails. You see, all my life I've been a nail biter. Sure, a few times I was able to grow them out, but sure enough, a month would pass and I would be back to my familiar nubs. I've had these suckers for over a month now, maybe even two. Heck, they've been long, so long, that I can't even remember when I stopped biting! Miraculous. I'm not quite sure how I've managed to keep them long, and oh so elegant, for so long now, but I think it has something to do with the spirit of my recently deceased Grandmother.
Let me explain.

As far back as I can remember, one of the most fascinating things about my Grandma was her long and perfect nails. My mother keeps her nails short (she's probably responsible for giving me the biting itch, thanks Mom), so her long and natural nails was always the topic of our conversations. We'd hold hands and I'd inspect her nails, and she'd point to them one by one, and talk about recent breaks, and chips. She always encouraged me to grow mine out, but I just couldn't do it. Until now.

So, just like people honor their late loved ones with shrines or tattoos, I keep my nails long for my Grandma. I'm actually very sad she's not here to see them. Funny, because they're just fingernails. I have a feeling though, that she just might be watching over these nails, keeping them long, healthy, and in her words, "purdy". Thanks Grandma :)

I think I'll break into your house, and hey while I'm at it, why not shower and shave my face!

I went out to dinner the other night with Whitney and her friend Megan, who both somehow are under the age of 25, in very successful jobs, either married, or engaged, either own a house, or are in the process of owning one. Yeah...I fit in...uh...

Anyways, Megan told me that the night her and her hubby got back from their honey moon, their worst fears came true when they discovered that their house had been broken into. The front door was un-locked and to confirm their suspicions, some jewelry of Megan's was missing.

This of course would be bad enough, but then they noticed the muddy footprint and hand prints in their shower. And that was just the beginning! After listening in awe at her story, I've used my forensic skills to recreate the unfortunate night:

I'm thinking this jerk got messy in the process of breaking and entering(I've heard it's quite a dirty job), and thinks,

"What the hey, I'll just shower here! And then I'll dig through some of their cardboard boxes...oh look! Here's an un-used electric razor, great! And after I rid my face of chin pubes, I might as well use this raspberry scented lotion they've got so conveniently stashed in the medicine cabinet. Hmm, but I better hide my evidence, so I'll hide the bar I used to break in, under the kitchen sink, who ever looks there?! Wait, wait! is this a can of SOUP?? Yes! After all, being this creepy squater has created an earth quaking rumble in my belly, and soup would suit me just fine. I'll just leave the can in the oven, they'll never find it there....I'm so clever!
Ja ja ja jack pot!!"

Poor girl had to scan every inch of her house, making sure she didn't miss anything else, throwing away any suspected item that he could have potentially touched(or molested). Worst of all, when she picked up the electric razor...hair fell out. Oh. My. God. Yuck.

I guess things are getting back to normal there, but I'm sure her showering experience will never be the same....

I've got a serious case of the SIGHS

Yeah, every like five to ten minutes I catch myself sighing, it's actually happening so much that I'm starting to get concerned. The hypochondriac in me, starts screaming "ASTHMA!! LUNG HOLE!! SOMETHING REALLY BAD THAT WILL EVENTUALLY KILL YOU VERY SLOWLY AND PAINFULLY!!!" Well, you get the point. There! I just did it! WTF?!

Maybe I just need some good ol' exercisin'.

Lately, I've been compulsively dancing almost every time I take a trip to the bathroom (the one place, that, I'm pretty sure I won't get caught), which is usually a sign that I need to get back into the studio. Really, I feel like I'm wasting away here. I realized tonight, as I was dancing in the bathroom, that I am a very talented dancer! I should say here, that it wasn't the dancing in the bathroom that made me realize this, rather thinking back at my abilities as a whole (but I will say that the bathroom dancing wasn't bad either). And, ya know, I should not sit back and watch those talents go to waste! If I do, I will wake up one day old, and pruney, and hate myself for it. So to fix this I MUST start class again, and hopefully I can get a job as a ballroom instructor (please please please!). After all, I can't keep being so pathetically poor, it's making me chronically lazy, and dancing would really be the just the job I need.

Other awesome things that happened to me today included:

1. After my very thrilling Spanish class, I walked to my car only to discover I had a 25 dollar no parking sticker fine stuck to my windshield. Weird word for such a horrible thing "fine", they do not happen to be very "fine" if you ask me. More fitting would be "pain in the asses". Wouldn't this sentence sound better: "I had a 25 dollar pain in my ass stuck to my windshield today"?
Yep, I think so.

2. Then, I walk into the house and greet Dinah with my usual MEROWW, and she looks at me, and immediately runs over to the huge puke spot she's recently created, sniffs it, then runs away. Thanks for bringing your BARF to my attention Dinah, appreciate it! So I clean the cat puke, and later Whitney tells me I used linoleum cleaner, instead of the OxyClean, because she re-used the container....oops!

3. After SEVERAL calls to the oh so reliable Niekko, my 200$ check does NOT get cashed. Big surprise there! I called him as directed at 3pm, because he said he would be at his office any time there or then after. "I'm not at the office, I'm at Kirkman, I'll be there in a few minutes, real soon, and call you..." He says all of that as soon as he answers the phone, without even waiting to hear my hello. So, an hour passes. I call him again. "I'm just about on 408, getting closer, almost there". Another hour passes, no answer. Three calls later, no answer. So sneakaly I call the office.."he's in a meeting". Meeting my ass! And that was that, no 200$ and I'm still broke.
SIGH.

Yikes how the time does FLY

So. it's 2pm and I am sitting here, in the same spot that I was in umm...TWO hours ago, wearing my robe with half dried hair. Way to take on the day! It does actually completely amaze me how quickly today seems to be passing. I really need to get something done today, something productive...maybe clean my room? Pack some? I don't know....perhaps dry my hair and get dressed? Eh, I'm not going to push myself.