Monday, April 21, 2008

Guess what Orlando?

YOU CAN SUCK IT.

Seriously. I am so FRUSTRATED right now. And if you can't tell by my ALL CAPS WRITING, my severely twitching eyeball should clue you in. And because luck is on my side today, the mouse on this computer has apparently taken up an alliance with my eyeball, and together they have set out to destroy me, because it too has been twitching all over the place. WTF.

So what has got my panties all twisted in a bundle you ask? Oh, just that I am BROKE and in need of a JOB.....NOW. Well really, two weeks ago would be more poignant... F-that, more like two months ago. And Craigslist? You two my friend can suck a big dank one because you keep feeding me nothing but spam! NO I do NOT want to work from home and miraculously make 5000$ a week! F-YOU!!!

Whoa,
Breath.....
In....Out....

Ok. Better. I'm just stressed beyond stressed right now because everything is piling up on me: school...money...weddings...money...moving...where's my wallet?...school.... You get the point. And then, if that wasn't enough, my eyeball wants to F with me and make me feel like a schizo. Really? Who wants to be aware of their eyelid for hours on end? Um, not I, no thanks.

I just have to keep telling myself that in a few weeks, everything will be fine....school will be over(PRAISE THE LORD, THANK YA JESUS!), and I will have a job, and everything will be just how it should be; calm. And if those thoughts don't help me, I can always remind myself that I am not this guy. Because then I really would be pushed to the brink. Ka. Boom.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Wednesday Wrap Up

To start this post, I thought I should give a BIG thanks to Pete (petegrein.tumblr.com) for posting a guest blog. And yes it is true, Pete (petegrein.tumblr.com) was a big help to me in my move, along with Whitney, Todd, and their parents, so thanks guys!

Although MOST of my belongings are here, there are a few stragglers left at the townhouse, so much to his disappointment, Pete (petegrein.tumblr.com) may have to help move some of my sh*t once again! He just makes such a great mover!...but not so much of a furniture arranger. We moved my entertainment center and my desk into my room last week, and after carefully aligning the two furniture pieces against the wall, I suggested to Pete (petegrein.tumblr.com) that my entertainment center might actually look better NOT lying...um, on it's side. Not quite the perfect arrangement, but it brought on a good laugh!

Did I throw out the blog spot enough for ya Pete (petegrein.tumblr.com)?

In talk of the boyfriend, I have to admit it's pretty nice having him back around. Although, after watching There Will Be Blood, I continuously fall victim to hearing him go on and on about milkshakes, always in his best execution of a Daniel Day-Lewis impersonation. But even with the impersonations (which actually aren't that bad), and singing, and punching of my arms, it suffices to say it's been Good Times all around.

Moving on...

I've been taking on the ginormous task of settling in to this new house as slowly as possible (much like the ripping off of a band-aid) and my life still resides in about twenty cardboard boxes spreading out all over my room and spilling into my bathroom.

Should probably work on that.

I'm sure I'd have everything set up and ready for action by now, if it wasn't for the fact that the process of unpacking hurls me involuntarily into long fits of nostalgic day dreaming (much like the process of packing, so I probably shouldn't have the same reaction seeing how I JUST saw this stuff...).

For instance, I came across my long time friend Heather and I's notebook, Petunia Rosemary (yes we named it), and as I opened it and read each letter, I couldn't help but jump back into the world of being and 8th grader once again. Here's pretty much the gist of every letter:

Dear piece of crap, chick-a-boo, pooper head,

How are u? I am BORED. What am I going to wear tomorrow? Should I wear shorts, or pants? I just don't know. Oh my GOD the Titanic song is on! I love this song, and Leo !!! I'm going to see Titanic this weekend for the 9th time, best movie EVER! Oh my GOD, So and So is sooooo FINE. I made EYE CONTACT wit him today! U better not tell anyone I like him though! U promised! What should I wear tomorrow? Shorts or pants? Pants or shorts? I don't know! Eew! We have FCAT tomorrow!! Uh, Mr. Honigman is SO weird! Ew and his white pants GROSS. Honigshlong!! N-E-ways, I looove So and So and u love So and So and we are going to marry them and have all their babies!!! Shorty swing my way...I love this song!! Okay chick-a-pee I gotta jet, but what am I going to wear to school tomorrow??? Ughh!

Yup that was basically our life as 14 yr olds. Ahh the good old days...

Anyways, yup I better get on this unpacking, if for nothing else, to see what other flash from the pasts I will encounter...

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Why Jamie Loves Golf...

by Pete Grein, petegrein.tumblr.com

Ladies and Gentlemen, I've traveled over half our state to be here tonight to tell you that Jamie loves golf because it affords her the opportunity to only have to lift a pen rather than 100 tons of her sh*!

Instead of having to move all of HER stuff from A.P. to W. Field, she was on a golf course baiting old gerry's (geriatrics), like Mr. Bandy, into contributing to meals-on-wheels (for kids). Therefore, the heaviest thing she lifted all day was a pen.

While she was out there offering free wedges, we here at Jamie's Sh* and Son's Moving Co. were lifting her bed, her entertainment center, desk, 127 lb. computer chair, dresser-ish thing, earthquake proof bookshelf, mini-shelf, mirror (i'm surprised that wasn't broken BY HER FACE! ha ha ha ahhhhh!!!! jk, J-hole) and 207 poorly packed boxes, some of which had to be repacked.
Thanks, Jamie! How's yer putter?

If I had a straw, I would DRINK YOUR MILKSHAKE!

pete
petegrein.tumblr.com

ps. I Like Your Socks...Yeah, you reading this. Yep, the ones you have on right now with the grey toes and red stripe. Yeah, they have holes; but, they are your favorites so, don't be ashamed of them. Love them like I do. Goodnight.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Hello Beautiful!!

Hello yourself, wink wink.
(This is of course my blog speaking, because she IS gorgeous, is she not?)

I spent a good many hours today tweaking and primping my page (hours that, I guess could have been spent packing, but hey, there's no day like tomorrow right?) and after all the sweat and tears my soul produced, I have to say I am quite happy with it. However, there is one discrepancy; I cannot take credit for that pretty pink flower... I stole it off another blog. BUT, I will probably change it soon, so that I can take full and sole ownership over my design and not feel like such a scam artist (in the most literal sense of the word). I do think I should get some credit for fessing up although, should I not?

Either way, I did spend quite a bit of time on this. One, because trying to figure out how to create three columns and tweaking the HTML was a bitch, and two, because when it comes to creative endeavors, I am one seriously raging, manic perfectionist. It's as if I save all the perfectionism that should exist equally in my day to day actions and force it entirely on the right side of my brain. I will go back SEVERAL times and change even the slightest "mistake" that no one other than myself will ever see. And still they exist, and torture me. I must have like nine or ten copies of my banner up there, that are all just ever so slightly different. One has "ON A WHIM" a little more to the right, one has it closer to the top, one has the flower showing a little too much gray around the bottom for my liking. While writing this I made a new one that had a little more space between the words and the flower......help me?

The same thing happens when I write. Although I usually ignore my punctuation mistakes (I'm the self proclaimed "Queen of Run-on Sentences, that tries to disguise them in parenthesis". It's a covenant title.), I have on many, many instances gone to bed, only to get out twenty minutes later to change one word. ONE word!

Seriously? I need a life.

Pete's Comic Book Rendition of our Trip!

It's super kewl and fauncy.

Check it out...

NOW.

Thank ya! :)

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

The Flip Flop Revenge

Heard a little story (I guess you can call it a story), in the few hours I spent in L.A. before embarking on Pete and I's Epic Quest to Orlando, which really made me laugh. So, because I like to make others laugh as well, I figured I'd share. I know, I know, you're welcome.

But first, a little back story:

A few days after returning home from L.A. last November, Pete asked if I had left a pair of crusty brown flip flops at his apartment. And yes, in fact I had. These "crusty" flops were just that, C-R-U-S-T-Y. They had been in commission for probably a year too long, mainly because I'm lazy; and so, were forced to trek on.... and on... and on (undoubtedly, these shoes had seen their day). Without hesitation, I told Pete it would be in their best interest if he'd put them out of their misery, and toss 'em. To which he SAID he'd do so immediately.

Fast forward to last week, and you can imagine my surprise when, while talking to Bobby and Ryan outside the apartment, I saw them reappear right before my eyes! They had NOT made it to flip flop heaven after all.

After reuniting with my old pals, I decided I still did not want these shoes (especially since they had been dubbed "crusty") so, I thought the best thing to do would be to contribute to the trash that is the run-down rooftop next door. Pete threw the first shoe (it landed face down, much to my disappointment), and just before I threw it's sibling, Bobby and Ryan spoke up, stopping me. I didn't really get it, why did they care if I threw the shoe? They looked at each other and concocted something to the degree of using my shoe as a bug smasher (they have/had a little bug problem, but don't cringe too much, it's no Joe's Apartment). So alright, that's kinda gross, but ok, whatever, "haha", my shoe's a bug killer. I got the feeling however they were BS-ing me, and I was somehow left out of the joke. Hi middle school flashback...

Later, the truth came out. Apparently my flip flop had been used as a way for Bobby to torture Ryan, and for Ryan to try to torture Bobby. One would hide the crusty flop in a strategically placed area where the shoe would then become a horrific surprise to the other. And back and forth they'd go. This is funny enough, but Bobby, I've decided, is a genius; coming up with some of the best hiding spots in history:

Under Ryan's pillow.
In Ryan's guitar case.
Taped to the back of the closed toilet bowl lid.
And my personal favorite, deep within Ryan's cereal box.

The last of which is my favorite mainly because, while the flip flop quietly awaited Ryan's arrival, Bobby and Ryan were busy debating whether or not to go out to eat, and Ryan decided that he'd rather just eat at home.

He was really craving a bowl of cereal. Little did he know...

And so, because of their little game, Bobby and Ryan were not yet ready to say goodbye and part with the flip flop that had brought so many laughs. And really who could blame them?

So there the flop will stay, and there the flop will play, in a cozy little apartment, on Rampart in L.A.

Friday, April 4, 2008

Texas smells like sh*t.

So we're on the road, just got into Texas, and we've got about another hour to go before we stop, and I'm feeling EXTREMELY antsy, so I thought I'd do a blog on the fly. Hurray! We've reached the mid point of our little adventure, and so far it's really been a lot of fun. I've been snapping pictures just about every three minutes, getting excited at every mountain type thing I see. We'll probably have about 500 pictures by the time we're done, so everyone get ready for the most exciting slide show you've ever seen!!

We just passed through a cloud of stank, and I mean STANK. Jamie: "what is that smell! It smells like SKUNK." Pete: "Yeah skunk that's been burnt. That, or burnt pop corn." Uhh...okay! Now I'll probably smell skunk every time I sit down to enjoy my movie with a bowl of pop corn in my lap...thanks Pete.

Vegas was exciting, especially driving up to it; it felt like my first trip to Disney World. So sparkly. We stayed at the Luxor, (the pyramid shaped hotel with the big dog thing in front, what are those called? I feel dumb.) and our suite was very sweet. What a sweet suite. I wish we had gotten there a little bit earlier, but, I did get to eat L.A. Chinese food, and I was very happy about that, and Pete had to pack the car....twice. I can't believe he got everything in here. I was expecting to see him shove the last thing in, only to have the whole car bust it's seams and send Pete's stuff a flyin'!

So Pete's trying to tell me right now that we have another FOUR hours to go before we stop, he's such a funny guy. And he just found a rock in his pocket....weirdo.

But yeah we made it to Vegas, and spent our night walking around and checking everything out. I also spent the night accumulating about 5 blisters, one of which is the BIGGEST blister I've ever had, and maybe even ever seen. I named her Bertha. So as the night was ending I was only slightly uncomfortable because of that, and I had to walk around bare footed to avoid the pain. Classy class, that tis me! I played the slots and won two dollars and seventy five cents...ballah!!

Okay, now it smells like a circus in this car! We just realized we had the outside air coming in, NOT a good idea. Know what else is not a good idea? Rolling down the window to confirm that the dank smell of circus is actually not inside your car. Because it isn't. And now you've just blasted your face (Pete) and mine with ranky dank circus elephant poo air. We nearly crashed in panicked laughter. Good times! We really need to get out of this car soon, Pete's started his opera singing, and is now dancing (I think?), and I'm pretty sure we could both benefit from stopping and doing a couple laps around the car.

So then yesterday was the Grand Canyon, which is not false advertisement, that thing is Grand indeed. A little scary only because you could pretty much jump right in if you wanted to, I'd really be curious to know how often that happens. It was definitely worth the extra travel time, something I'm really glad I got to experience, and with Pete (awww)...special times, special times.

We saw the Meteor Crater in Arizona today something like 4000 feet across...say what?!

Okay, we're heading to the hotel, so I'm signing off for now. I'll have some pics up soon, but in the meantime, check out Pete's blog: petegrein.tumblr.com He's got a video up of Vegas and the Grand Canyon. Bumpin' Grein Productions....can ya dig it?

We can dig it.